MONEY TALK: What is "Enough?"
Hey! I’m bringing back my blog posts on money and finances to kick off the new year. Why? For several reasons, including that I just quit my day job—a decision I do not regret the very least. It’s the best gift I’ve ever given myself. As I’m writing this, I’m soaking in how much I cherish this moment in my life. Over the holidays, I finished three books. I’ve been able to go to yoga in the middle of the day, plus have energy to go bouldering, which is how I like to intentionally spend time with my partner (and which my partner, in return, also appreciates). I’ve waken up slow, scheduled my own days, and I feel so happy to just have hours to burn sitting at a café, sipping a coffee, with nothing to hurry me to my next appointment. It is absolutely blissful.
What I have is a privilege. I have money saved up; I am able to receive health insurance through government-subsidized care. I have many support systems. I am healthy and able-bodied. I live in a region of the state with a lot of public transportation options, and my husband is very loving and supportive, which is immensely helpful during this fluctuating time in my life.
Which brings me to my next point. I’d love to know: if you were me, how would you feel? Would you be freaking out, not having a job? Or would you be so relieved, to have a reprieve from the demands of your day job and all of your life’s “should”s? Would you be frantically applying to jobs? Or would you savor this time off to return to those precious activities that truly make you happy?
What does this have to do with money?
Whether we like it or not, our relationship with our money is inextricably tangled with everything we do.
My relationship with my money has allowed me to step away from my nine-to-five, and to take this break so I can recollect myself. So I can save myself. So I can return to loving myself and so I can reconnect with joy and my purpose.
And a lot of my relationship with money has shifted because I’ve come to terms my relationship with what I believe/believed was “enough.”
Let’s dig into this.
For you, for your very unique life situation, what is enough? Does “enough” mean an apartment? A house? A tiny home, or an RV? Does it mean having enough money to eat out at restaurants three times a week or to catch a movie at the theater once a month? Two cars? Three? One? No cars? Does “enough” mean you have a subscription to Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, Crunchy Roll? Or do you not need any subscriptions at all? Is enough a closet full of clothes with plentiful options for every occasion, or is it just 33 pieces of clothing you rotate through?
I’m not here to judge your answers. You can share with me—or you don’t. That’s fine.
What does this have to do with my money, Joanne?
One of my biggest lesson of 2019 was this: Financial peace comes from knowing what is “enough” for us, individually. And, for many of us, “enough” is often less than what we think it is.
And one of the biggest, more important ways we can develop a more fulfilling relationship with our money is through reconciling ourselves with what is enough for us. And, from there, we can better negotiate and clarify how we can better, more efficiently, spend our hard-earned money in alignment with our values and our life goals.
I hope, by sharing my own money thoughts and processes with full transparency, I can open up a honest and real dialogue with more people about how we spend our money, and how we can live more fulfilled lives without feeling shame or frustration or guilty with money.
So I’ll start. Here’s what enough would look like for me.
Roof over my head with a yard for my dog. A resource-connected location so I don’t have to walk or drive too far to access many different bookstores, coffee shops, grocery stories, or a diverse selection of restaurants. One bedroom with a small kitchen and a little living room. Two bedroom would be nice—I’d love to have a home office someday. Currently, my budget for rent would have to be $785 (what I currently pay) or below. ($785)
Cell phone. ($70—about to lower this payment by switching to another plan.)
Utilities. ($175)
One car. I have two right now, but our family can make due with one car because the public transportation where I live is stellar. My husband works within walking distance of his work, which is cool. (About $330 a year for car insurance; about $50 a month for gasoline.)
Money to cover pet expenses. Our deductible is $200 a year for pet insurance, after which we are reimbursed 90% for all other relevant expenses. We pay $60 a month for pet insurance, and the peace of mind is well worth it. Monthly, between T and I, we spend maybe about $100 a month on dog-related stuff, but we could easily take this down to $80 for just Oliver’s food. ($30/month for pet insurance; $50 for pet-related expenses)
Between the two of us, T and I spend maybe $500 a month on groceries and household goods, like food, toothpaste, shampoo, etc. ($250/month)
Yoga studio membership—for my physical and mental health. Totally worth it. ($99/month)
Vertical World membership—for physical and relationship health. Worth it. ($58/month)
Entertainment subscriptions: Netflix ($12), Spotify ($10), Disney+ ($7).
Food out at restaurants—this is a pleasurable activity for me, so I don’t mind it because it’s convenient, and I genuinely love eating out at restaurants. ($250/month)
Coffee. ($80/month)
Books. ($25/month—but am hoping to reduce this expense by using the library more!)
Happiness budget. (Fluctuates, but maybe $100/month for going out, social eating at restaurants—eg, I’m buying food because it’s socially expected, not because I’m hungry—and paying for fun experiences.)
Public transportation. ($40/month)
Health insurance—currently, from the state, because I’m unemployed. ($90/month—will fluctuate as I make more/less money via freelancing.)
Miscellaneous expenses: Car and house maintenance (need to figure this out).
Note: The above expenses do not include my business expenses. I have a few subscriptions I use for my business, including Canva and this website. Also, I don’t have children and I don’t plan on having any kids anytime soon. I’m also an able-bodied person, so my medical expenses are relatively low. A lot of unique factors make my life relatively “easy” to life.
So what’s my “enough” total?
$2181. So, my annual income to get by and be relatively happy is about $27,172 (without considering needing to put away about 20-30% to savings/retirement and make a few payments to my student loans and credit cards—so, comfortably and realistically, this number is probably closer to $30,000 or os).
How does this number sit with you?
And let’s be honest, if I really tried, I could probably scrape by with even less—I can definitely stop buying books and commit to using the library; I can choose not to buy any new clothes and be perfectly fine; I can cook more at home and make my own coffee—but this budget feels the most aligned with what feels fulfilling and joyful to me.
Again, for many of us, “enough” is far less than we really think it is.
And, truthfully, I think coming to terms with “enough” may be a revelation many of us sorely need.
And if not for us, then for our planet Earth.
But this could also be plenty good for our soul, too.
What is your relationship with money like?
What is your life of “enough?”
How can we make sure every dollar we work for—with our limited time and our very limited energy—be spent in a way that is aligned with our values and with our life purpose? Do you value your 50+ hours of work at the office (and if yes, that is perfectly valid!)? Or would you value more time with your family and friends and your dog?
What are the gaps between the reality of your spending and your life purpose, your dreams?
I don’t have your answers for you, but I hope this blog post gets you thinking—and then, I hope, it gets us talking. About money. About our hopes and dreams. About how spending our money is impacting our planet Earth. And all of our life purposes.
I’d love to hear your thoughts and feelings. What came up while you were reading this blog post? What questions come up? Frustrations? Excitement? Let me know.
Note: Many of these same ideas and thoughts are touched upon the book “Your Money or Your Life,” by Vicki Robin, which instigated all of these money-related revelations again. You can find the book here (affiliate link). I strongly encourage you to check it out!